1. 6th graders are too old for recess.
2. Token economies aren’t worth the annoyance.
3. We’ve moved past the “stealing from the teacher” phase of the year.
4. (Insert coworker’s name) can’t actually be THAT difficult to work with.
5. Since our extremely tense behavior meeting with A.’s dad, the school director, the cultural liaison and our middle school dean, A. and I have really turned the corner in our relationship and he definitely won’t talk back to me anymore.
6. Proctoring state testing for two days will be much less stressful than two regular teaching days!
7. Students whose parents work in our school would never dare seriously misbehave.
8. Students whose parents work in our school, catch them misbehaving, and proceed to ream them out in front of their entire class, would never dare misbehave again.
9. Whatever my students are saying in Somali that is just so hilarious, I really want to know what it means.
10. J. might yell out the opening line of “Baby Got Back” (Oh. My. God. Becky) as he walks into the classroom, but he wouldn’t actually keep singing the very explicit lyrics to that song. And especially not during my reading lesson.